Life's too short ... to spend any of it in traction

I had my next posting all figured out when a friend of mine, Mitch, wrote a response that clearly indicated he was on a completely different 'Life's too short ...' journey to me. Now this is not surprising because he always has been way cooler than me. So not surprisingly he took this blog to be some kind of encouragement to go out and do reckless things - like taking up surfing.

Not true and in fact if you are fifty five years and up, the message that 'life's too short ... to spend any of it in traction' is for you. Rough rule of thumb here -if your Mom said it was stupid to do it when you were ten, then it is not a good idea to do it in the period of life that people seem to qualify with the names of precious metals.

-- Bit of a clarification here: although I haven't heard anyone actually talk about the 'platinum years', I'm pretty sure it will be that time when we decide to lay down our burden and have our every need attended to by people dressed in brightly coloured scrubs --

To add dramatic emphasis to this blog, I almost attached a picture of my son in traction when he was four years old but I thought he might not appreciate it. So discretion has been used, but it's clear from the evidence in my possession that I know what I am talking about. Instead, I have gone with the precious metal theme and thought you might enjoy the famous condom skit from the Golden Girls - Isn't Betty White a hot commodity right now
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gyhlnL0AbmI

Life's too short ...to resent the time spent in your car

I don't have a commute anymore but I remember the days well. Those of us who live in Vancouver know the joys of the traffic build up caused by the congestion at our various bridges and I have wiled away many an hour - enough to realise that you cannot afford to resent that time or to miss any opportunities that the car ride presents. If you are alone in your car (and why are you not car pooling?) but if you are, you have many opportunities to turn your ride into a time for growth or just plain fun.


Option 1 - turn your car into a travelling ashram. Play natural sounds in the background, unwind, contemplate something deeply. No meditating is allowed but good breathing, utilizing the ergonomically designed driver's chair to improve your posture and calming the mind is a truely wonderful use of time. You can also practice foregiveness ... if that person cuts it - just be compassionate and assume their business is more important than yours. And you can smile at people at traffic lights - thus making their day a little brighter.


Option 2 - dance! If you have yet to discover the joys of chair dancing let me tell you how absolutely brilliant you can be when you don't have to worry about what your feet are doing. Just moving the top half of your body can make you certain that 'you think you can dance'. Times when you are standing still at traffic lights etc provide opportunities for the more complex moves you want to try, otherwise just bop along while keeping your eyes and focus firmly on the road. Don't worry about those looks from other drivers, after all, are you ever likely to see them again?


Option 3 - become a culture thug. It isn't often that you can play classical music or opera full blast, sing along and conduct when you are at a stop. Imagine, no neighbours to bang on the ceiling and you can let you can belt out that piece of music that you have been longing to perform on stage. Don't let rap fans have all the fun. And if you want to see how emotionally cathartic this can be, take a look at the part where Tom Hanks plays at full volume, the Maria Callas aria to Denzel Washington in the movie Philadelphia.

Here, take a quick peek before someone forces You Tube to take it down http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3b0p9mTJOJI

Life's too short ... to argue with uber-authoritarians.

Of all the lessons I learned in law school, chief among them was never to allow the words ‘I know my rights’ to pass from my lips in front of an officer of the law or other authority figure. The wise Prof knew that if any of us got full of the zeal of the young law-grad going we would do nothing but force authority figures into over drive just in order to take us down.

For those of us who are lucky enough to live in countries where the concept of the rule of law applies, the idea that the rules aren’t applied fairly can be quite a shock to the sensibilities. I know how authority figures can get right under the skin when you: only went to get change for the meter; were only there for two minutes; did not see the sign/fire-hydrant/fine print etc, etc and often you can just be on the wrong side of an authority-thug; but believe me, there just isn’t enough time in the world to change the mind of an uber-authoritarian by sheer force of your superior knowledge, intellect or brilliant turn of phrase.

You need to be smart: smile, ask for their name or i.d. ‘just in case you have any questions in the future’, use your smart phone to record details and photos and then deal with your defense later. Incidentally, don’t make matters worse by snapping the official/officer’s photo (red flag at a bull material). If you have a legitimate case you are more likely to convince a dispassionate person than a raging ego-maniac. Copy the letter you or your smart friend writes to the department to your civil liberties association or elected representative – anyone who will watch how the rules are applied. If they get a number of complaints about the same person then this is a valuable piece of information that they will never get hold of if all you do is wate your time standing toe to toe with Officer McEgo.

If you have no defense then why are you wasting your time? Don’t be angry with a person for doing their job. 'Fess-up, pay-up, chalk it up to experience and get on with life in the areas where you deserve to win.

Take a peek at “10 Most Unreasonable Parking Fines of All time”
www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-547350/Tickets-rile---We-reveal-unreasonable-parking-fines-time.html

Life's too short ... to carry a grudge.

To understand the scale of this understanding for me, you need to know that I am a Scot and we can carry a grudge for centuries - through multiple generations. We can still feel the pain of getting ripped off by the Act of Union with England in the 17th century for goodness sake. And so letting go is genetically hard for me but it needs to be done. Breathe in, breathe out and let it go.

Getting eaten up by anger and bitterness does nothing for the soul or the complexion. That cortisol hormone does terrible damage to a body that does not need any more stress - trust me and my multiple frown-lines on this one. On a more global and less self-centered level, the world really doesn't need even one more angry bitter person looking for ways to get back at something - anything. Breath in, breath out and let it go.

Work with me on this role-play. Go to the mirror - first smile and then look angry. Which version of you do you want to hang out with? Breath in, breath out and let it go.

Life's Too Short ... to chop salad and veggies.

Believe me, I'm all for recycling and being socially responsible but I really cannot include washing and chopping my life away in this category. It maybe means that Farmer's Markets won't work for me but at least I'm not driving a Hummer to the market, and I am not using gallons of water to wash mother earth off my spinach - surely that counts for something. I'm a single woman it doesn't even make economic sense to watch left-over fresh veggies rot in my fridge and then there's all the cleaning out of the rotten stuff. I am, however, more than happy to wash my cans for recycling as there is no viable alternative for the environmentally conscious.


BTW - no arugula in the salad mix if I am eating at your place!

No, it really just makes sense to do something else with my time - patting a dog, emailing a friend, emailing a not-so-much-friend, getting some exercise, paying a bill I forgot, cleaning a closet, contemplating my next move.

Life’s too short … to miss a chance to help another.

The big stuff – our quality of life, relationships with others, the amount of misery and crime, are all made up of small decisions that we make every day: dump that person, follow that leader, buy this, sell that, don’t make the phone call, forget about the donation, ignore the hungry guy on the corner or the kid devastated by an earthquake. It’s the small things that make up what we vaguely refer to as the ‘world we live in’ as if ‘the world’ happens by chance.

There is enough of the chance stuff without any of us missing an opportunity to do something that makes a difference – and maybe all the difference in the world. I’m taking no chances with that karma-thing because I have a strong desire to live in a better place.